|i am the phone-in dj|
This article originally appeared in MEHSTG Vol. 2. Issue 31 (February 2003)
a bunch of seemingly opinionated people the masters of the football
phone-in are. The
Funky Phantom looks at what makes these
people constantly correct in their views.
Ever driven home from a game and been stuck
in traffic listening to the god-awful football phone in programmes ?
Yes, havenít we all. Well,
what possess people to phone up the radio station to go on air ?
The host often begs people to phone in, as
his show is nothing without the callers, but once on air, the member of
the public suddenly becomes the butt of abuse from the presenter.
Whatever view the caller puts forward, the man at the mic will take
the opposite stance. Now I
know that this is his job, but it could be the complete opposite of what
he had proposed in the previous call and it seems like the wind will blow
the opinions of the presenter whichever way will provoke most ire.
Playing the Devilís advocate has to come naturally to the
phone-in host, as he must belittle the fans who ring up and also try and
stimulate some debate to continue the lights on his switchboard flashing.
But what chance does the caller have ?
Well, next to none really. I
have heard the most sensible and reasonable arguments put by supporters,
but the host will ridicule and deride any view that they may care to put
forward. They will rubbish
the point of view until the caller gives up or if the fan does get the
better of them, they suddenly have to move on to the next caller, thus
terminating what for them would be a losing discussion.
invariably produce a load of feedback as they still have their
radios on when they phone
try to beat the delay on the transmission by swearing
just slag off players/managers/local rivals with no sensible
say what they want to, then produce some embarrassing silences when
questioned on the points they had made
It makes you cringe when one of your fellow
fans gets on air and proceeds to make the rest of us (as we are all tarred
with the same brush) appear to be ill-tempered and opinionated morons.
There are some class moments, such as the one on TalkSport after
our home game with Arsenal, when the Spurs fan asked Lawrie McMenemy why
the guests in the Sky studio had been invited.
He queried why George Graham was there and then wondered how Sol
Campbell, Graeme Le Saux and Dale Winton had all got in there too !
While the former Sunderland boss eventually caught on, it was too
late as the point was made.
Every time a team loses one match, the fans
ring in to call for the head of their manager and the host encourages that
line of discussion as it promotes more callers to snowball in and keep
that ball rolling. Some of
the worse for this are Arsenal fans.
Arsene Wenger must be the worst manager in the world according to
some how call in, despite all the success she has brought that club. A few bad results and they donít have such a rosy view of
their team coach.
I have often considered phoning in as a fan
of an opposing club to put an outrageous view, as this would greatly
please Spurs fans and also enrage the fans of the team I was pretending to
support. You could really
mess up the show by claiming that the team needs a radical overhaul and
that the manager should be replaced.
Even better than this is show on Monday
night that I sometimes catch on the way home from reserve matches on
TalkSport. It is about
European football and involves an opinionated radio front man, who has two
experts (sic) from European countries, whose views on players and teams he
disparages, without any more justification than he has a view which he
thinks deserves more weight than anyone elseís.
You can phone in to reveal your transfer rumours that you have
heard. Some are totally
fabricated and some have a grain of thought to them.
Again, it could be so easy to wind up fans of other teams by
phoning in bogus rumours. Perhaps it is just too easy.
So, you ask, why do you listen to these
programmes if you are so disdainful of them ?
To answer that, there is nothing much else worth listening to !
Sometimes, I will put on a tape, but in the vain hope of hearing a
match report or an interview with someone from Spurs, I listen in with
hope. Most of the time, the voice of the presenter is the thing
that grates the most. Sometimes,
it detracts from thinking about the game I have just seen.
Sometimes, it just takes my mind off the traffic.
Whatever happens, as long as it is not David Mellor, you can at
least tune in without wanting to put your foot through the radio !
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