Sent in by Brian Dawes (a Gooner), but you can see the funny side
 (and if you can't, then don't hold onto the  defeat, just let it go)

Reports are coming in that Tottenham Hotspur Football Club are to be charged with bringing the game into disrepute by the Football Association for failing to show up at an AXA sponsored F A Cup Semi Final held at Old Trafford on Sunday 8th April.

A spokesman for ENIC said 'It's most unfair that small Clubs like Spurs should be singled out in this manner. Obviously we don't mind if the FA relegate us because we haven't been interested in the League for 40 years now, but a fine is just unthinkable. You can be assured that our lawyers will fight all the way if there's so much as a penny fine, after all we've still got to shell out to Southampton and George .. am ... um ... er ... that is to say ... if Mr. Graham has better lawyers than us and wins his case.'

Arsene Wenger is reported to have said 'I zinc eet is unfair eef zay charge Tottenham.  After all Manchester United dizappeared to Brazil and zey were not charged. Tottenham are a little Club and I zinc eet would be grossly unfair to penalize zem just because zey have no players of quality'.

Glenda Hoddle was still hiding in the boot room at Old Trafford and was not available for comment.

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