lemony shylock’s unfortunate set of footballing events


If Spurs Were a Cartoon Character

I’m not sure when the realisation clicked, but somewhere in the post-pub haze of channel 4’s countdown of “100 Greatest Cartoon characters” a few weeks back, I was given a most painful analogy of our beloved spurs. 

This may sound hardly a revelation; after all no pre-season publication is complete without a fan being asked which root vegetable or musical duo their team most resembles.  However, it was the sure unexpectedness of what is perhaps the most astute summation of spurs I have heard in a good few seasons that took me by surprise.  Having just established there was no actual character called Master Bates in Captain Pugwash, I was sitting down to a usual Sunday evening of nonsensical drunken banter with the boys, when the countdown reached number 47. 

“You know instantly, no matter how good his plan is, or whatever he has bought, eventually he is going to cock it up.”  While the commentator was at the time talking about his adoration of the character Wile E. Coyote, for anyone accustomed to the odd afternoon down the Lane however, this character study had another relevance a lot closer to home. 

Never mind “Wolfus-Idiotus”, to any spurs fan watching he may as well have been talking about Teamus-Mediocres.  Thankfully before I could cut into one of embarrassing rants, which the Fulham result the day before had temporarily subdued, the tribute to Coyote continued. 

“Still you have to love him”, explained another comedian type “part of the fun of him is that you’re sure he’ll get there one day”.  Who says cartoons are a load of old rubbish ?



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